Take immediate action

And do whatever will impact your goal the most.

Planning is important, but acting is more important. You can refine your goals later or tweak your approach. For now, ACT. You'll feel a surge of energy from this that will build your confidence and propel your forward faster.

I challenge you to do it! You'll do it well, better than you think. Or, you'll learn something vital and amazing. Either way, a great success.

Choose one small thing to ACT on today. Do it, and write down how you feel. Continue to do this once a day and you'll see a big result!

Wishing you much success!

Make money in a recession?

I really like the way this guy thinks! He has a very interesting perspective I hope you'll check out.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2008/12/how-to-make-lots-of-money-during-a-recession/

Is your marriage/relationship likely to fail?

This researcher has a reliable method for spotting the signs of relationship doom. Look at the signs, and see if your relationship or marriage is in need of big help.

Is your marriage/relationship likely to fail?

Famous researcher John Gottman has identified

a reliable method for spotting the signs of relationship doom. Look at the signs, and see if your relationship or marriage is in need of big help.

The signs include

1. How a discussion begins -- using harsh language, being negative, or showing contempt lead to a failed discussion with a negative outcome. On the other hand, being positive increases the odds the discussion will end on a positive note.

2. The "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse." This common group of 4 warning signs almost certainly leads to divorce.

First, Criticism -- not to be confused with healthy "complaints." Complaints are fine. They are facts about feelings and situation, i.e., "When you didn't show up on time, I was angry." Criticism however, spells disaster. An example of criticism is, "You're a selfish fool for being late. Why can't you wear a watch you idiot?" Criticism attacks a person's character and leads to relationship breakdown.

Second, Contempt -- a common reaction to criticism. Eye-rolling, sarcasm, making a mockery of a conversation, etc. This is the worst of all 4 signs, as it communicates disgust. It also escalates conflict. Resolution is impossible when one person is communicating with contempt. All efforts will be doomed to fail if contempt is present.

Third, Defensiveness -- a reaction to contempt, becoming defensive means a partner is saying "the problem is not me, it's YOU." This of course results in escalating the problem farther. Resolving the problem is impossible.

Fourth, Stonewalling -- more common in men, though sometimes used by women, stonewalling means tuning your partner out. Becoming non-responsive. The lack of response usually enrages the partner farther, continuing the conflict. Or the conflict is dropped, but not resolved, often leading to loneliness within the relationship or divorce.

3. Becoming Flooded -- this happens when one partner becomes emotionally overwhelmed. It happens because one partner had used negativity including defensiveness, contempt, or criticism. Disengaging is a common reaction that provides a temporary protected feeling, but usually leads to divorce.

4. Bad Body Language -- stress changes in the body due to flooding, such as an increase in blood pressure, make it much harder to think intelligently and resolve the conflict. Instead, partners fight or flee, leaving the problems unsolved and wounds fresh. This means the problems will not be resolved and will come up again.

5. Failed Attempts to Repair -- one partner in a happy relationship will reduce conflict by making a joke, giving a smile, a touch, a hug. These actions work to reduce conflict, preventing the negative chain of events. However, if one partner has already reached the flooded stage, these attempts to reduce conflict will fail.

6. Recalling Bad Memories -- if this negative chain of events happens enough, couples will be left with much pain and unresolved problems. This creates a series of bad memories that leads to negativity. This negative view actually distorts the past perception of what's happened, leading to see the partner as "bad." This spells almost certain doom for a couple.

References:
Dr. John Gottman, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
Dr. John Gottman, Why Marriages Succeed or Fail...And How You Can Make Yours Last
http://www.isoulseek.com/sitebranches/relationskills/articles/6signs.pdf

Happiest Countries -- America isn't in the top 10

Money doesn't make us happy -- we heard this. We knowingly nod when others remind us of this. But we don't actually believe it. We scoff at celebrities spending thousands, we jealously say bitter things about people with better jobs than us, we insist that CEOs must never have any problems because of their huge paychecks -- all showing that we really do think rich people are happier than us. And if only we made more, we too would be happy.

But there's a reason America didn't even make the top 10 for happiest countries in 2009.

We're wrong. People are not happier with huge paychecks.

These lies are one reason America is not one of the happiest countries, despite our standard of living.

Most all of the marketing we've breathed in since we were children has lied to us -- insisting that buying more will make us happy -- that carrying a certain handbag or having a nice car will make us "better."

Money, like food, can make you feel secure, but it won't add to the quality of your life -- you can only eat so much food in a day. Excess food, or money, stacked up, won't really make you jump for joy with bliss. It'll just pay your bills, make your belly full -- which are important, just like having clean water is important. But after your survival is ensured, as it is for most Americans, what will make you happy is not more money, more food, more clean water -- that's our biggest fallacy.

It is relationships. That's what makes us happy. Loving, being loved, being understood, understanding others, being parts of groups who know us and care about us. That is the missing link in America. We don't know how to do that, the way we know how to go to work, make more money, and buy more cars. Marketing led us to the mistake, but it's up to us to change it.

You need a certain amount of food each day to live, just as with money. But you can only eat so much in a day, and in a lifetime. Having a bunch of extra food might be a good idea -- you can store it in case of emergency, and have extra to give away to others if need be. It might even make you feel secure knowing you won't have to worry about food again. But after that, your life is just your life. Having an enormous refrigerator or pantry full of mac 'n cheese to last you decades can only up your joy factor so high. It won't make you happy. It will just make you full. Money is the same. It won't make you full of joy. It will only pay your bills. That's it -- that's all it will do.

Make your money, make yourself secure, but chase happiness in your relationships, learn how to have them, discover what good ones are, learn about yourself and others -- that will make you happy for a lifetime the way a big pile of food or green bills simply can't.